Rejection stings. Even when you know, rationally, that it shouldn’t.

I remember being so proud of the Mars cover letter I spent hours crafting on my bed at university back in 2008. I was gutted when I got rejected. As a lifelong chocolate fan, I’m not sure I’ve fully recovered.

I was recently featured in The Independent talking about why career knockbacks can hurt so much more than we expect. Zoe Ball spoke openly about “grieving” missing out on the Strictly presenting role.

Grieving after missing out on a job or a promotion is more common than you’d think – and it’s something I see a lot with my coaching clients.

We tie so much of our self-worth to our jobs, often without realising it. So when we don’t get the thing we wanted, we’re not just losing a role – we’re losing the version of ourselves we’d already started imagining.

The temptation is to brush it off and move on. But sitting with it, even briefly, is worth it. Why did you want the job so much? What did you want it to say about you? The answers can tell you more about yourself than the job ever would have.

And if Mars are listening, don’t worry, I still love chocolate 🍫 (this pic is from 2008 – the very same year I applied)